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Central Station

Relationship Gender Norms & A Surprise Night At A Hotel


On Thursday my boyfriend Daniel landed in Stockholm. We’ve done 14 months of long distance now, FOURTEEN, which felt like an impossibility before. Everybody told us that long distance never works out, you’ll break up, don’t do it. Now it’s three weeks left of it, and we’ve made it. It is possible!

This was the last trip he would make to visit me in Stockholm so I wanted to surprise him with a hotel night just for the two of us. So I emailed this funky place and told them about my plans to see if they’d be up for helping me treat my man. And they responded with a YES, LET’S DO THIS!


Standing on the cold autumn streets of Stockholm with Daniel’s hands in my hair I told him about my plans. Just the two of us for a night, no flatmates, no relatives, no parents disturbing or people needing to socialising with.

It might sound small but not if you haven’t properly had time just you for over a year. Like a child he couldn’t contain himself when we walked to check in. It’s just by Arlanda Express which is perfect for all of us constant on tour.


Is there anything more glamorous than a well clad receptionist uttering Welcome, Miss Wiberg, you’re room is on the third floor with a surprise. Hope you enjoy your stay. 


Not used to being treated with such dignity we looked at each other big eyed. I could so get used to this. As soon as the doors had closed in the elevator and we had swiped our keycard to get to our floor we could not keep off each other anymore.


We stayed in a deluxe room that sure had a view(!), feeling like royalties, eating chocolate truffles and playing with the northern lights effect above the bed.


After a day and night out we walked alone in the cold back to the hotel and lied under the poofy duvets in the 280cm(!) bed talking about what the upcoming months withhold, where we’ll live, what we will do and how our relationship will once again change. It’s longed for and terrifying and I can’t wait.


I woke from the white winter light tickling my eyelids, hearing Daniel’s heavy breath amongst the four massive pillows. The autumn sun shone down on our clothes spread out all over the floor. It’s lucky that the hotel breakfasts are the highlights of a stay and makes it less heavy waking up.

Nordic-Ligth-Hotel-Stockholm-BreakfastThis one was no exception and we sat eating slowly slowly, flicking through the daily newspaper, sipping coffee, going for another round of waffles, making it last a little bit longer before it was time for us to check out for this time.


I try to treat Daniel to more ”girlie” stuff quite often. I feel so bad for boys who don’t get treated or pampered! When we first started seeing each other I bought him 50 tulips on a normal sunday and I thought he’d start crying. Nobody has ever bought me flowers before!

It’s difficult with gender norms in a hetero relationship. Especially knowing what comes from us as individuals and what’s from our societal heritage. Like Daniel hates everything that has to do with cooking whilst I adore spending hours trying new recipes and stirring pots all by myself. Is that because he’s a guy and I’m a girl and we’re taught that from start? Or is it just us and our preferences? Despite what the correct answer is I think it’s important to challenge it and not ”own” certain parts of the day but help each other break habits.

Either way treating each other with things we are not used to getting is important. It can be by surprising with a hotel night but also by making an extra nice breakfast on a normal weekday, plan a game night for just you two or buy two tickets to a cinema or a band you want to see as a surprise.


Thanks again Nordic Light Hotel for helping me treat my man.



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