During the upcoming week I will retell snippets from how my thoughts went during my trip to Stockholm. Told as tiny stories. An old format on this blog, but with a new title.
The temperature is down flirting with below 20. I run, late for the train every single time, along the frozen pavements, sliding, fumbling, trying to not fall. I swear to god this new routine of being the one who’s late doesn’t sit well with my self perception. My gloves lay warm and still on a shelf back in London because I had repressed the raw gnawing of the cold before coming and absent mindedly left them behind. The weather is eating at my bones as I stress down to the station.
I take my phone out of my pocket and my fingers sting with numbness as the screen flashes and dies, it’s not due to lack of battery power but because nothing survive in this climate. This is honestly unbelievable. Now there is no way for me to know if I’ll make the bloody train, so I slid, trying pick up my pace. My lungs ache from the brisk air as I run. The fact that there is actually an area named Sibirien in the middle of Stockholm seems suiting. The train leaves the platform right before I enter which means I will be late. FUCK YOU FUCK THIS FUCK EVERYTHING. Second day of my writing course where I’m the only one without a journalist degree and I’m late. I guess I was already an underdog, so I might as well continue down that line.
My fingers are stiff and I shove them back in my pocket. Luckily I brought my fur coat. I feel indulgently guilty when I wear it, even if it’s vintage. The right elbow has ripped and the lining is all frayed, which makes me like it even more now that it’s clearly not new. People around me on the train cast passive aggressive looks. I cannot help but enjoying pissing people off, provoking a little on the morning commute. A woman in flawless Acne boots and an expensive purse doesn’t even acknowledge the homeless woman asking for spare change, but pauses her game of candy crush to scoff at my coat.
We pass through the pastel buildings, glistening in snow. I miraculously get to school on time. Apparently they start the day with a 15min coffee break? Only in Sweden.